Each phase of life comes with its own challenges and opportunities, so let's lessen that load and find more ease and (inner) peace.
Have you ever found yourself feeling unsettled?
You find yourself thinking that you need to be doing more because you saw 'so and so' on Instagram doing well, or maybe you think signing up for another course is the answer. Or perhaps you are focusing on so many things outside of yourself, or things that are so far into the future, that you miss the current season you are in...
If you keep making decisions only to find they aren't what you want, and it just makes life harder, and the unsettled, overwhelmed, and uncertain feelings continue... this is for you!
Life can often feel overwhelming. If it isn't work, business, creating a business, children, family, health, health changes, wondering what the right thing for you is, oh, I need to do the washing, eurgh, I forgot to pay that bill, book that appointment, I feel blurgh, maybe let's get takeaway and watch a movie, oh, but I haven't done any exercise for a week, and I need to go shopping, the fridge is empty!!!
Eurgh, how do I keep up with everything, gaaaahhhh!
Does that constant mind chatter feel familiar to you? That constant whirling sensation happening inside your mind when you are feeling unsettled and overwhelmed?
I will place a bet that you especially feel this way when you are caught up in external expectations, the societal 'shoulds,' and consistent comparisons to others. I will also bet that you want to make a change but find decision-making hard.
Here is the thing: we could spend our whole lives keeping up with everyone else's standards—the saying 'keeping up with the Joneses' came about for a reason—or we can stop looking at someone else's life season and choose to embrace and create (this is important) our own!
How does that sound?
The back-and-forth (in our mind) overwhelm can sideline you, and leave you feeling stuck, so you keep 'thinking' of ways to get out of the stuckness, and you often aren't taking action at this point. The feeling of overwhelm is so intense you don't know where to start, let alone what to start on!
In moments like these, it's essential to bring the focus back to ourselves and the present season of our lives.
By concentrating on how you feel rather than what you don't have or what someone else has, you can begin to reduce the overwhelm and build a deeper appreciation for YOUR life; the one YOU are creating.
Overcoming overwhelm
It's easy to feel inundated by an endless list of things we need to do, especially when we want to have more in life. But when societal perceptions become more of a priority than our own inner peace, or you find yourself using 'should' in a sentence, it's a sign that there is self-abandonment at play.
If the activities and goals being pursued aren't aligned with your true self or you feel so overwhelmed that you end up doing nothing at all, is this really the life you want to create for yourself?
The overwhelm builds up when the focus is external, or not your own, and it can impact various aspects of your life.
When this happens with my private mentoring clients, we always shift the focus back to basics—which tend to go to the backburner when overwhelm is in charge—and get them into their bodies and feeling again. And that's not just sitting on the couch meditating or a somatic embodiment session. It can often be as simple as a walk or a dance around the house—anything that gets them literally MOVING away from the 'stuckness' and that never-ending stream of thoughts—because movement is nearly always the answer to getting out of overwhelm and into flow.
Simplify and Focus Inward
Another tip for moving out of overwhelm is to simplify our focus, and that focus moves from what is happening outside of ourselves to what is happening inside of ourselves. It can be hard to embrace the season we are in if we aren't being 'in' it.
Here are some ways to do this:
Prioritise feelings over goals and possessions: paying attention to how you feel rather than what you have is a game changer. There is a reason why daily gratitude practice is so popular—it works! When you let your daily focus be on what nourishes and feels good, rather than racing unhappily towards something you aren't sure you want, there is a shift, and that shift comes from the inside out. A little more peace, a quieter mind, a less anxious focus.
Appreciate the present: focus on what is present in your life rather than what's missing. Where focus goes, energy flows. Try it out—when you catch yourself stuck in a spiral of what is missing, list 5 things you DO have, and really FEEL the gratitude for them, and notice how that changes how you feel.
Mindfulness and self-reflection: I recommend to my clients and the women in The Nourished Woman Collective that daily mindfulness practices and evening self-reflection will help you better understand your needs and desires. Taking time each night to reflect on the day can help you keep track of what is and isn't working, and when you do this reflection before you go to sleep, you give your mind the chance to 'brain dump' intentionally and onto the page, instead of trying to do it when you are falling asleep. When you take time to reflect, it helps you to make choices that are aligned with your true self faster than you may have in the past.
By embracing these principles, you can navigate your journey with more clarity and less overwhelm. Remember this: the key is to honor your unique path and appreciate the season you are in, because someone out there is wishing they had the life that you have created, so take time to be the creator and love all the parts of your life.
Overcoming overwhelm begins with a shift in focus, from the mind into the body. When you concentrate on how you feel and appreciate your present circumstances, you can reduce the pressure to conform to external standards that probably aren't what you want anyway.
Embrace the season you are in, cultivate gratitude for what you have, and find peace in your unique journey.
Carissa x
P.S I'm all about the holistic approach to life and living life at our own pace. I moved from the masculine go-go-hustle-more life to a slower, feminine, and receptive life and it has absolutely changed everything for me. I love bringing insights and self-nourishment tools and tips to enhance life and our overall wellbeing and happiness into the Nourished Woman Collective. Each month we explore a new theme of life to help you thrive!
P.P.S I dropped a free guide to thriving through perimenopause - so if you are 35+ and you want to learn how to thrive through a very significant season of life, grab your guide and the email series that accompanies it by clicking on the link HERE
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